If self-care is our primary focus we are more likely to have the energy to do our job with love. Again, this is a counter-intuitive idea, but a very important one for becoming a Loving Authority. Doesn’t it make sense to build a tower of support around the main engine so the household will run more smoothly? Our focus on the needs of our children weakens this main engine if we put them above our own needs. It is our job to learn how to maintain and sustain those boundaries in a loving way. It is our child’s job to keep testing them.
So how do we apply self-care? The first step is to make space somewhere during the day to slow down even if it’s just for five minutes. If we move at our habitually fast pace it is hard to be aware of bodily sensations that are connected to our underlying feelings. An emotion is a physiological sensation that either feels good or bad but unless we make it a practice to turn our attention inward, it is hard to notice what we are feeling.
Start with feeling your breath coming in through your nose or mouth….then notice where you feel movement in your body. Is it a small area in your belly or a sensation of movement in your chest or ribcage. After a few minutes ask yourself what you need and if you don’t have an answer try it again the next time you stop to turn your attention inward. Keep asking, “What do I need?”
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